


Wrong Number

by fakemagpies



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Explicit Language, Idiots in Love, M/M, Sexting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:55:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26790241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fakemagpies/pseuds/fakemagpies
Summary: UNKNOWN NUMBERSorry i’ll stopI am now about 85% sure ur not HuxFINNI am 100% not Hux.Or, Finn gets a message meant for someone else and inadvertently gets involved with some weirdo.
Relationships: Finn/Kylo Ren
Comments: 16
Kudos: 73





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I can't fully commit to Kinktober so here is a miniseries...or something.

_11:10_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

So I really had a good time talking to u tonight. 

I usually don’t make a connection like that with ppl

_11:20_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Did u want to do something

In the future

Like get dinner

Or go to a movie

_00:27_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Hello???

_05:21_

**FINN**

You have the wrong number. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Hux??

**FINN**

Not Hux. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Are you sure?

**FINN**

What?

Of course I’m sure. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Is this a joke

U put the number into my phone yourself

So this has to be Hux

**FINN**

It’s not Hux. 

I don’t know, maybe Hux’s finger slipped when they put it in.

Or maybe they intentionally gave you the wrong number.

But I’m 100% not Hux.

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

That doesn’t make sense tho

Ur super type A so there isn’t any way you’d make a mistake putting in your own number

And i thought we hit it off so why would you give me the wrong number

Is this some kind of test? Ur like into military tactics and stuff 

It’s hot though

**FINN**

Dude. One, stop saying “you” when you refer to me. I am not Hux.

Two, I can see why he gave you a fake number. 

I’m going to block you now. 

_12:22_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Ur really not Hux??

_16:37_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Ok ur probably not Hux

Bc i bumped into him on campus

And he totally ignored me

He wasn’t being obvs about it but he clearly ducked into the girl’s bathroom to avoid me

_16:44_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Unless this is some kind of kink you have?

In which case, i’m down

**FINN**

DUDE.   
I AM NOT HUX.

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Oh u didn’t actually block me

**FINN**

I thought you’d get a clue and just not message me anymore.

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Sorry i’ll stop

I am now about 85% sure ur not Hux 

**FINN**

I am 100% not Hux.

_1:48_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

He’s the kind of guy who would do something like this tho

_1:55_

**FINN**

The kind of guy who’d jerk you around? It sounds like you dodged a bullet. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

He;s really hot tho

And he talked to me even though there were hotter guys at the party

**FINN**

Let me get this straight.

You like him because he’s hot and talked to you once?

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

I guess

**FINN**

That’s it? Do you even have anything in common?

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

We’re both in prof snoke’s history class 

Well he’s in the class and i am a TA

So we talked a lot about the upcoming exam

**FINN**

Was it possible he was just using you to get answers for the test…?

_2:05_

**FINN**

I’m sorry. I was just speculating. 

But if that’s the case, he really is a jerk.

_2:07_

**FINN**

Oh, now you won’t answer?

_3:45_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Sorry busy at work

But ur right, he probably was

fuck

_3:49_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

[image]

Do u know how to repair drywall?

_5:21_

**FINN**

Did...you punch a hole in your wall?

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Yeh

**FINN**

Wow.

Google it yourself. 

_7:10_

**FINN**

I’m glad you’re okay though. I was kind of worried last night. 

_18:22_

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

Can you look at a picture of my junk

There is a mole there that i am not sure looks right

**FINN**

No. Absolutely not. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

What is your name

**FINN**

I’m not giving you my name. 

Also people usually ask each other their names before asking people to look at their genitals. 

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

It was a legit medical question

**FINN**

Go see a doctor. They get paid to look at your junk.

**UNKNOWN NUMBER**

I need something to call u in my contacts list 

My names kylo

Do you live in corusant

**FINN**

Don’t add me to your contacts list.

I guess the city is big enough that I can admit I do. 

**MAYBE: KYLO**

How old are you

**FINN**

Shouldn’t you have checked that before the offer of nudes?

**MAYBE: KYLO**

U write like a tight-wad so i assume you’re over 18

Just curious on how much older though

U could be like a creepy old man

**FINN**

I’m the creep? 

That was said incredulously, by the way.

How old are you?

**MAYBE: KYLO**

I’m 29

**FINN**

I’m 23. 

**MAYBE: KYLO**

Cool

Pretty much the same age

What do you look like

**FINN**

How do I know you aren’t some weirdo axe murderer looking for his next victim?

**MAYBE: KYLO**

Lol what

Maybe weirdo but not the other stuff

_20:53_

**FINN**

You can call me FN for now. 

_11:19_

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Have u ever sexted

**FINN**

I’m legit going to block you. 

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

It’s really fun, i’ll start

**FINN**

Please don’t. 

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

face fuck me until i’m raspy

**FINN**

That’s not sexting, that’s just a very explicit command. 

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Can u do better

**FINN**

I am not going to fall for this very obvious trick.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Worth a shot though lol

_3:33_

**FINN**

If I saw you, I'd have you up against the wall with one hand around your throat and the other down your pants. 

You'd be whimpering and begging for me to fuck your brains out but I won't. 

I'm going to make you earn it.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Holy shit that hot

What hapen s next

**FINN**

You, on your knees, between my legs. 

There are tears in your eyes as your mouth is stretched by my cock.

I’ll wait until I can feel my cock firmly at the back of your throat before cumming into your mouth. 

And you’ll swallow it all down like the good boy that you are.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

W

Hpr

vwry jit

**FINN**

Are you masturbating right now?

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

ywsh

_3:36_

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

That was so fucking hot

I came

I haven’t even cleaned up yet

I keep re-reading ur msgs and feel my dick twitch

It kind of hurts

**FINN**

TMI. That’s disgusting.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Im your dirty boy

**FINN**

Goodnight.


	2. dick pic

_15:13_

**FINN**

Is Kylo your real name?

The longer I think about it, the more fake it sounds.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

It wasn’t the name i was born with

But it’s the one i go by now

**FINN**

Oh.

Sorry.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

It’s cool

“FN”

**FINN**

That’s pretty much my name. 

Just add two letters somewhere in there.

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

FANA

FENI

FING

Am i close

**FINN**

Not by a long shot. 

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

U don’t have to tell me if ur not comfortable

**FINN**

When did you suddenly learn boundaries?

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

I am trying not to mess this up

This is the best relationship i’ve had in a while

_20:51_

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

they’re playing carrie on channel 6 soon

Do u wanna watch it together

_21:45_

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

The pig blood thing always gets me

_00:43_

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

FN??

_1:12_

**FINN**

What do you mean by relationship?

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

?

**FINN**

[screenshot]

**PROBABLY AN AXE MURDERER**

Why am i saved as probably an axe murderer

I thought we clarified that

**FINN**

I’ll change the name.

But answer the question.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

After the sexting stuff and the past couple of days of talking i thought maybe we could see where this goes

It doesn’t have to be romantic or sexting

just as friends

**FINN**

You don’t even know my name. 

We know nothing about each other. 

I can tell you now we’re never going to meet in person. 

This is really as close as we’re ever going to get.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

But we can still talk right

**FINN**

I’ve been thinking about that all day.

I don’t think we should text anymore either.

Most wrong number interactions usually don’t last this long.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

But you kept replying 

You even said u were gonna block me twice but didn’t

**FINN**

Yeah, and I’m doing a lot of introspection about that.

I’ve been lonely.

I don’t have any family. My best friend is studying abroad and won’t be back for another month. School is hectic, work sucks, and I have a lot of complicated feelings towards another friend of mine so I’ve been avoiding him for the past two weeks as much as I can.

Which also means I’ve been avoiding my larger group of friends as well since they can’t seem to do anything without inviting him.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

All that but u still won’t tell me ur name??

**FINN**

Fuck off.

_2:20_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Sorry

u were being vulnerable and i was being a duck

dick**

I understand if u wanna stop talking

_2:30_

**FINN**

Send me the picture of the mole. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

[image]

**FINN**

Okay.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

What do u mean by that??

The mole or my dick is ok?

**FINN**

They both look fine.

[screenshot]

I sent a message to the guy I was telling you about.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

“I really like you as a friend and even a little more than that”

Cute

Did he respond yet

**FINN**

Not yet. He’s definitely asleep right now.

Sorry for going nuclear on you earlier. We can still talk, if you want.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I want to

**FINN**

Good.

I’m going to bed. Goodnight, Kylo.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Gn fn

_8:09_

**FINN**

[screenshot]

He responded. 

Holy shit. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Wow

U were avoiding him for nothing

That’s a resounding yes

**FINN**

You don’t know how long I’ve been fantasizing about this. 

This is surreal.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Ask him for a dick pic

**FINN**

I am not going to ask him for a dick pic before we’ve even gone out on a first date. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

but you will be asking him for a dick pic right after?

**FINN**

Definitely right after. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

welcome 2 the dark side. 

_15:20_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I get ur busy with ur new bf, but u could answer one of my texts every now and then

_11:11_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

It’s been like a week 

Did u lose your phone or something

_18:44_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Okay so i think he might have murdered u

And if that’s the case, then it’s probably a bad time to point out that you’d once falsely labelled me as one of his kind

I will leave “i told you so” out of the eulogy

But i really can’t think of any other reason you’re not answering my msgs

_19:04_

**FINN**

You think you’d be the one delivering my eulogy?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

it’s alive! It’s alive!

**FINN**

Sorry, I’ve been opening your messages and meaning to respond but I kept getting side-tracked. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

How is mr x 

**FINN**

Who?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Your new bf. You blocked out his name in the screenshots so i don’t know what to call him

**FINN**

Oh. You can call him P. 

He’s wonderful in every way. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

That’s cool

Is it all chaste or

**FINN**

Or it’s none of your business. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I’d tell u if i was getting laid 

**FINN**

I don’t doubt it.

Speaking of not getting laid, is your Hux’s first name Armitage?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

harsh

And yeah

How do you know that

**FINN**

He’s my boss’ boss at work. I think his dad owns the company or something because he’s a bit too young to be that high up.

He’s usually called the General among the rank and files so it didn’t ring any bells.

He came in today and someone called him Mr. Hux and it kinda clicked.

It’s such an unusual name that there was a good chance it was your Hux, especially considering his age. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Wow we’re that close to each other??

Wow wow wow wow ow

Does this mean we can meet up now

**FINN**

No. 

It kind of freaked me out, to be honest. 

I could have met you before, y’know?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

i can send u a pic of my face

So u know 

**FINN**

I don’t know if I am ready for that. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

[image]

U didn’t say no

anyways

here i am

it’s kind of a bad pic

_19:34_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

It wasn’t that bad of a pic

**FINN**

It’s a very nice picture.

I just didn’t ask for it.

[image]

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

u saved the picture of my junk?

**FINN**

I am collecting pieces of you. 

Since I am not sure which part I will see first in public. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**   
Now you sound like a creep

I don’t walk around with my penis hanging out

**FINN**

That’s a relief. 

_20:59_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

How would u rate it on a scale of 1-10

_21:09_

**FINN**

Are you talking about your face or your dick?

_21:15_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

U can do both

**FINN**

7.

9.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Which one is a 9

**FINN**

Face.

The light reflected harshly in Finn’s face as he saw Kylo begin to write something then delete it several times. He wasn’t lying - if that really was Kylo, he has the most striking eyes Finn had ever seen. His face was like an abstract piece of art, too: every feature contorted at a weird angle framing a set of full lips, moles haphazardly speckled throughout. Finn was sure he could draw constellations on Kylo’s body. 

_21:21_

**POE**

Hey Finn, did you want to go to the Museum of Flight tomorrow? 

I can show you the kind of planes I used to restore. 

**FINN**

Yes, I’d love to. When did you want to meet?

**POE**

Would you want to go after your morning shift?

Around 8:30?

It’s a little early but it’s less crowded then.

**FINN**

No that’s perfect. 

I’m already up anyways. 

**POE**

Awesome. I’ll pick you up!

WITH a cup of coffee. 

😊

**FINN**

Thank you. :)

Doubt I’ll need it if I’m with you though.

**POE**

;) 

I’m gonna head to bed then. See you on the flip side. 

**FINN**

Goodnight!

Finn re-read the text sequence four times to make sure he didn’t come off as too much of a loser. Just when he’d convinced himself that he probably played his cards right, he read the banner that had just appeared at the top of his screen. 

_21:27_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Have you seen me before

**FINN**

No. 

I would definitely remember having met someone who looked like you. 

Kylo did the little dance again: write, delete, write, delete, write, delete. Finn decides to put his phone down and head to bed early for once. Sometimes he’d stay up all night talking to Kylo, who doesn’t even seem to know what sleep is. Finn can’t really understand why he keeps responding to him. He chalked it up to his inability to ghost people. He’d also been really lonely before, that’s for sure, but now he’d been going out with Poe everyday for about a week and a half now. Rey's going to be back in 3 days, too. 

_22:55_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

sometmes i masturbate thinking on u

Except i don’t know how you look so it’s just a shadowy figure with a hand around my neck and jerking me off

**FINN**

I thought you’d figured out boundaries.

I have a boyfriend now, remember?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

sorry

inappropriate

_1:14_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I’m rlly sorry

That was bad and i knew i shouldn’t have sent it

I can’t sleep 

Did i mess this up

It was a joke

**FINN**

First off, that was definitely not a joke.

Two, since when do you sleep?

And three, we’re good. Don’t worry.

Unfortunately, I’ve gotten used to you at this point. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Ok, thx

Gn fn

Finn’s fingers lingered over the keyboard before he hit enter.

_1:17_

**FINN**

My name is Finn.

_Write, delete, write, delete._ Finn didn’t know if this is how Kylo always typed or if he’s just noticing now. The younger man had trouble believing Kylo’s messages weren’t just the first thing that popped in his head. 

_1:20_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

gn, Finn. 

Finn’s read and re-read the message. Oddly, he’s disappointed.


	3. Chapter 3

_8:40_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Hux probably had your number bc you worked for him

**FINN**

To be honest, that hadn’t really clicked until now.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

That has to violate some employee thing

**FINN**

Probably but doesn’t really seem like there is anything I can do about it.

Seems weird that he’d know mine out of all of them. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

U both have the same last 4 digits, 2187

**FINN**

You finally got Hux’s real number?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I looked it up online

There are places you can pay for information

**FINN**

That’s not weird at all.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I was just curious

I’m not going to call him or anything

Maybe sign him up for spam tho

Anyways

So u work for Hux’s dad’s company huh?

**FINN**

I should have known you were bound to look that up.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I still don’t know which branch yet

**FINN**

Yet?

“Hello, Earth-to-Finn?” Poe briefly took his eyes off the road to steal a glance at the silent figure in the passenger seat. “I’d ask if you are awake but you’re texting pretty vigorously there.”

“Oh, sorry, last minute work stuff.”

Finn’s not really sure why he lied. Probably because he doesn't really think he could properly explain what the truth actually was. A nagging voice in the back of his head told him that he should come clean about his text-sometimes-sext friend but instead, Finn opted for a grin. “Okay, there. Phone’s off and in my pocket. I’m all yours.”

Poe simpered, leaning into Finn. “Lucky me.”

_[24 unread messages]_

_8:41_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I mean i don’t want to know that at all

Bc i want to respect your privacy

If u want me to know u would tell me

I am happy jst texting

And i wouldn’t ruin it for something small like that

I probs also wouldn’t tell u if i did anyways

_9:20_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

R u mad at me?

_10:12_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Im sorry

I get it i understand

I’ll stop messaging u

_12:52_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Before i go i wanted to say i rlly liked talking to u

I can tell sometimes u were really annoyed but you understood i wasn’t actually a bad guy

It felt like u saw me for who i was 

Thnk u for that

_14:13_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

[image]

If u haven’t blocked me yet, this is a pic of the sword that belonged to my grandpa

Its really special to me and i wanted to share it with you but i screwed things up before i got the chance

_18:49_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I guess if you’ve blocked me i can probably keep messaging into the void

_19:30_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

It’s kind of pathetic to message knowing you won’t get a response

This is the same shit i did when gramps died 

It was depressing when no one responded but then the new owner told me to “fuck off”

From gramps number

It shouldn’t have but it hurt

_21:07_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Goodnight, Finn.

He'd gotten home and showered before realizing his phone was still off in his pocket. He was sure Kylo'd been messaging him throughout the day about the date. He wouldn't have admitted it but a small part of Finn was eager to talk to the other man anyways. However, as Finn stared at the message chain, a sudden sense of dread washed over him. _Goodnight, Finn._ There were too many things wrong with it.

_Calling Kylo (Weird Guy)..._

“Pick up, pick up…” Finn chanted beneath his breath until he heard a click and a frenzy of shuffling noises on the other end. “Kylo?”

Silence. Finn took the phone away from his face and checked if he was still connected. “Are you there? Kylo?” Okay, now there was just heavy breathing on the other line. Finn preferred the silence. “It’s, um, Finn.” Instead of a response, there was more shuffling noises and the creaking of something heavy being laid atop worn out mattress springs. “Kylo, damnit, will you say something so I know I am not just talking to myself?”

“Finn.” A pleasurable chill went up the younger man’s spine as the baritone voice echoed through his mind. This is how Kylo sounds? “Hi.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Kylo responded two beats later. He can hardly believe this is the same guy that never seemed to stop texting. “How are you?”

“What do you mean, how are you? You scared the hell out of me!”

“Wait.” Kylo seemed contemplative. “I can’t tell if you’re mad at me for the messages or for what I said this morning.”

“Neither, you dolt! You scared the living daylights out of me with your last message. You never sleep this early and before you were talking about your grandpa and how hurt you were so...I, well, assumed...you were going to do something reckless.”

“You were worried about me?” There was a certain astonishment in Kylo’s voice that almost made Finn sad. As if he was shocked someone would care. 

Finn wanted to cry as realization set in that the older man was fine. He hadn’t realized the level of anxiety that had been building up inside him. “Of course I was! You’re my friend, dude. I don’t want anything to happen to you and if something ever did, I don’t want you to think I hated you. My phone just off and I didn’t think to turn it back on until I got home. I’m not mad at all.”

“Thank you, Finn." There was an almost feral quality to the other man's voice and a chill went up the younger man's spine. _He’s got to be doing this on purpose_ , Finn thought. “You sound really hot, Finn.”

Finn frowned although he’s willing to admit that his heart is beating a little quicker than it should. “Well, I’m glad to know you’re okay...and thanks, I guess.”

“No problem,” Kylo responded, almost immediately. “Now that shadowy figure has a voice.”

Yup, he’s definitely okay. “Goodnight, Kylo,” Finn sighed.

“Goodnight, Finn.” 

The younger man almost thinks he can hear Kylo smiling. 

_5:29_

**FINN**

Me and P broke up. 

_8:10_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Are u ok

**FINN**

Yeah, I’m fine. Took the day off from work anyways. 

We were better off as friends. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Weren’t you pining over this guy for a long time

**FINN**

Yeah. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

things were going well tho

**FINN**

Yeah.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Do u wanna talk about it

On the phone

**FINN**

Are you going to try to initiate phone sex?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

No

Yes

No

If it happens it happens

**FINN**

You’re honest and horny to a fault.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Sorry

I can stop

It’s partially joking

**FINN**

It’s okay. I get it. 

_9:05_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Why did you guys break up

**FINN**

Something happened during sex.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

With P?

**FINN**

Who else with? Idiot. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Sorry

Keep going

**FINN**

I don’t want to.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

You can’t quit when it wa just getting good

**FINN**

It’s embarrassing.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Oh

For u or him

**FINN**

Me. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Ohh

It happens to everyone you know

**FINN**

No, not that. 

I said someone else’s name. 

Okay, fuck it. I don’t wanna talk abou tit anymore. 

about it*

_10:10_

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Whose name

**FINN**

Yours.

_Incoming call from Kylo (Weird Guy)..._

_Call rejected._

_10:11_

**FINN**

Why are you calling me?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I wanna hear you say it

**FINN**

Say what?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

That you said my name while you were with another dude

Just the thought of it makes me hard

**FINN**

Why do you always do this?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

What

**FINN**

Get sexual. Do you realize that before Poe I hadn’t had sex for two years?

Then suddenly this guy, out of nowhere, is sexting me. It’s kind of dirty - I don’t know how he looks or who he is. It’s kind of kinky. I’m into it against my better senses. 

Then come to find out, that same guy whose been saying “fuck me fuck me” this whole time is hot and hung and now I have that image in my mind. All the while, I am not actually getting laid and all this sexual energy has no outlet beyond my left hand. 

Do you not see how that could mess with someone's head?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Wait 

I never said “fuck me fuck me”

**FINN**

It was illustrative language and that’s not the point. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I would fuck you though

**FINN**

You don’t even know how I look.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I don’t care how u look

As long as it’s u i don’t care

**FINN**

I have a bunch of big, oozing warts all over my face and terrible body odor.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

The first thing i’d do is lick the ooze off each of the warts and take a big whiff of you

**FINN**

You’re such a weirdo. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

U already knew that

Tell me about you and Poe

**FINN**

How do you know his name is Poe?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

[screenshot]

You let it slip above

**FINN**

Oh.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

i won't use it if it makes u uncomfortable

**FINN**

No, it's okay.

What do you want to know?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Start from when he first touched you

**FINN**

He slipped a hand around my waist, very gently, and pulled me into him. He kissed me. It’s almost like he didn't want my mind to be anywhere else because he grabbed the sides of my face and made the whole thing feel so possessive. 

After that, there was a lot of fabric-on-fabric action. There was nothing I wanted more than to just suck him off. 

Poe is so fucking hot, you can’t imagine. He'd somehow managed to take off his shirt and it’s unfair that he could be beautiful and built like that, too. 

There isn't a sport he can't play, and he's got these little scars on his arm from years of working in a machine shop. I just wanted to run my finger along all of them and learn the story of each one.

Poe could tell I hadn't done this in a long time so every touch, every movement, every word was soft and reverent. He handled me like I was a priceless work of art.

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

Stop

**FINN**

You were the one that wanted to hear it. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I changed my mind

Go to the part where you say my name

**FINN**

By that point, he had two fingers inside me, getting me ready, telling me to relax. Are you sure you want to skip all that?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

How much did you guys do before you even said my name

**FINN**

What is your problem? 

Sorry you’re not the main character here. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

U made it sound like it was immediate

**FINN**

Well, it wasn’t. 

Anyways.

It was like I was floating on air. He was laying light, butterfly kisses into the crook on my neck and his breath was so hot and wet against my skin, it was like he was branding me with his lips.

He started breathing a little harder. I felt like I was in orbit. A guy like him was getting off to someone like me.

It was a dream come true in every way. I wanted time to stop in that moment. 

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I don’t want to hear it anymore

**FINN**

What?

**KYLO (WEIRD GUY)**

I don’t want to hear it anymore

I’m tired and i have to work tonight

I’m going to sleep

Good night

Ot morning

whatever

_Calling Kylo (Weird Guy)..._

_Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system…_


	4. enter the dragon a.k.a. rey's back

_10:34_

**REY**

let’s do the ‘explain how you confessed to poe and broke up all before I got back’ challenge

you start!!!

**FINN**

Did your plane land already? 

**REY**

‘stop avoiding the question’ challenge!!!

**FINN**

There isn’t much to tell. We were just much more compatible as...not boyfriends.

**REY**

he’s perf

you’re perf

together you’re extra super duper perf

so, like, HOW

**FINN**

I wish I had some concrete explanation with all the bells and whistles and in-depth Freudian analysis that could satisfy you but all I can really say is that it just wasn’t clicking, you know? 

Romantically, at least.

**REY**

hmm ok! i won’t press it. i’m just sorry i wasn’t there for you and kind of pissed i had to hear it from jessika after it all went down.

**FINN**

Yeah, I am sorry about that. I just didn’t want to distract you. You were doing your finals and preparing to come home so I thought you had a lot of your plate already. 

**REY**

you are a sweet bean of a person but you could never ever distract me. you’re already on my mind 24/7 <3

so what i am saying is i’d rather fail a final than miss being there for you when you need me

**FINN**

Please don’t make me cry in class.

**REY**

i love you <3

but dilemma

do i uninvite poe from the welcome back party or are we skipping

**FINN**

I’m not going to let you skip your own welcome back party. 

I can be in the same room as him. It’s not like it was some heated break-up. We’re still friends. 

I think. 

**REY**

you think?

**FINN**

It did end kind of awkwardly. Poe was his usual gracious self but you know, sometimes I think behind that 10-out-of-10 smile, he might actually be human like the rest of us.

**REY**

omg why do i get the feeling this story is so much more juicy than you’re letting on 😩 

**FINN**

Okay, deep sigh here. 

When do you get back home? 

**REY**

yeeeeees!! i am on my way now, will be at my place in 30 min. 

**FINN**

I can be there with an assortment of pastries by then. 

I’ll try to explain without bursting into flames from embarrassment. 

“What the actual heck, Finn?” Rey shouted as much as she could with a mouth-full of eclair. “That’s so dangerous. That’s something I’d expect Snap to do but, like, I thought you would be smarter.”

“I know, I know.” Finn had just finished telling Rey about his ‘friend.’ He’d left out names (he was frankly too embarrassed to tell her his name) and a lot of major details about his conversations with Kylo but if the abridged version was enough to elicit this reaction from Rey, Finn swore he’d never tell her the whole story. For both of their sake. 

“So Poe...what, discovered some texts between you two and thought you were cheating?” She tried to fill in the blanks and bridge the missing pieces of the story together but something was very off. Rey’d always felt like she was a bit psychic, but she didn’t really need any supernatural help to know that Finn was leaving out a big chunk of the story. She didn’t want to pry - Finn was a very private and guarded person. The fact he was telling her this much just showed how much he trusted her. She wasn’t about to do anything to destroy that. 

“Not cheating,” Finn started, thinking back to the moments just after his little indiscretion. “But he definitely thought there was something there and that we shouldn’t be dating until I figure it all out. I tried to tell him he’s got the wrong idea but…”

“But what?” Rey leaned in eagerly. The donut that was about to enter her mouth stayed suspended as she waited for her friend to speak. 

“But that’s why I think maybe I haven’t been looking at the real Poe this whole time,” Finn thought back to the clouded look on Poe’s face as they were re-dressing. “He was mad. Really mad. And upset and embarrassed and looked like he wanted to curse.”

“Well, duh, of course.” The young woman leaned back into the sofa, seemingly unsatisfied with what was clearly not big news to her. “Finn, I love you but you’re so stupid sometimes. What did you expect? For him to be cheery and happy after finding out the guy he likes might be into some other dude? And topping it all off, he’s thinking about that other guy even when he’s with you? C’mon. I know you saw Poe through super rose-colored glasses but this borders on insulting.” 

Finn’s eyes widened a little but Rey didn’t notice as she headed to the kitchen for another glass of milk. “Insulting…?” he echoed in a whisper.

“Yes, insulting,” she said before sitting back down. Rey reached one hand out to touch his shoulder and took a long sip before speaking again. “He’s a complex human being and you thought you were dating Mr. I-Have-Only-Positive-Emotions-And-Perfect-Understanding. You were dating an ideal, not a person.”

“I guess you’re right.” Finn grumbled. He felt like a jerk. “He was hot, too.”

“And he was hot, too.” She smiled and patted his shoulder before returning it to the almost-empty box of treats. “So what about your text buddy?”

“Oh, him?” Finn piqued. He examined the half-eaten donut sitting on his thigh. “He ghosted me.”

“What!” The word came out as a statement rather than a question. “What happened?”

There was no way Finn was going to tell her about the circumstances around it. “He just stopped answering my texts and won’t pick up my calls.”

“Show me the last few text messages you sent.” She licked some melted chocolate off her fingers. “C’mon, lets see ‘em.”

“Uh, it’s okay. I don’t really care at this point.” Except that Finn cared. He cared a lot more than he wanted. He’d tried texting as if nothing happened but he hadn’t gotten any response. Each time he tried to call Kylo, which was multiple times a day, it would ring twice and then go to voicemail. He didn’t know what pissed him off more: the fact that Kylo wasn’t answering him at all or the fact that he knew that Kylo was still reading his messages and definitely screening his calls. “I’m glad you’re back, Rey. I feel like I got this lost because you weren’t around.”

“I’m glad to be back.” She knew Finn was trying to deflect. He’s always been good at it. If Rey hadn’t caught on early in their friendship, she might not have noticed what he was doing. “My aunt wants me home tonight. Do you want to come and sleep over tonight and tomorrow? They're definitely going to be over-the-top about me being back and I need someone to help make them bearable until the party on Sunday.”

“Sure.” The older man was glad that she hadn't pressed him. “I’ll just have to go back to my apartment to pack a bag. Let me know when to swing by.”

“I will.”

_13:18_

**FINN**

It would be easier if you just used your words, Kylo.

_14:56_

**FINN**

In case you didn't see it, Nightmare on Elm Street is on Channel 6.

_15:44_

**FINN**

I know you're reading these messages.

I wish you'd at least tell me if you really aren't ever going to respond. 

_16:09_

**FINN**

It's going to rain this weekend.

You seem like the type that never checks the weather report so just an FYI.

_17:12_

**FINN**

I can't believe it October already.

The street outside my building is already dusted with leaves.

_17:15_

**REY**

hey we can actually come and pick you up so you don’t need to come over

**FINN**

We?

**REY**

remember my cousin??

**FINN**

The one with the anger management issues?

**REY**

that’s the one ✨

my aunt and uncle managed to convince him to be my chauffeur

and for some reason (probably any of a million), he’s in an even worse mood than usual so don’t be offended if he says or does something rude

**FINN**

Should we be in a car with him? Because I just checked and the land bridge isn’t open until tomorrow morning so it’s an hour to your folk’s place. 

That seems like a long time to be in a car with something that can be described as having ‘unchecked aggression.’

**REY**

should be fine, doubt he’ll try to drive us all off a road

FYI he’s going by some goofy name now

so i said your name was storm t. rooper so pls play along

the ‘t’ is for tiberius

**FINN**

Do I even want the details behind this?

**REY**

nope!!! he’s been doing stuff like this for as long as i can remember 

i remember the first day after my adoption became official, my aunt forced him back home 

i was only 10 and he was like 20 and even then i could tell he was too old to be that childish and super moody

**FINN**

What are my other name options here?

**REY**

i’m sorry babe but i’ve already told him it was storm

unfortunately i still have to be rey since he’d catch on if i tried to be anyone else

**FINN**

I don’t want him to flip out when he finds out you’re making fun of him…

More precisely, I don’t want him to flip out on me. 

**REY**

you’ve never met my family and i doubt they actually listen when i say my friend’s names

so just say your name is storm??

**FINN**

I don’t like the idea of lying to your folks. I plan to know you for a long time so they are bound to find out.

**REY**

aw <3

my aunt might get uptight about it when she figures out eventually but uncle will LOVE it

esp if it goes on for years

**FINN**

Well, if you put it like that, even if your cousin kills me, I’ll be immortalized in the eyes of my best friend’s uncle. How could I deny the honor?

**REY**

that’s the spirit!!!!!

we’re outside, come out now

our car is the one where i am waving excitedly out the window

It took Finn (“Storm”) all of two seconds to spot Rey hanging out the passenger seat window half a block down. “There is enough room in the back seat for your stuff. Just throw it in!” Rey said as Finn approached. Without exiting the car, she unlocked and opened the backdoor. 

Against Rey’s advice and hoping not to anger the driver, who didn’t bother to greet or even turn to look at his new passenger, Finn gently set his bags down in the unoccupied seat next to him. His first act once he entered the car was to reach a hand towards the mass in the driver’s seat. From his angle, Finn couldn't get a good look at the other man's face. Even his profile was obscured by a mess of unruly dark hair that hadn't seen a comb in a while. “Hi, I’m F---” He stopped himself as Rey shot around in her seat to glare at him. “Storm?” He flashed a confused smile even though he was sure the driver couldn’t see it. 

Once Finn got the hint that the other man wasn’t going to budge, he pulled his hand back into his lap. Rey hadn’t talked a lot about her cousin - she’d mentioned him a few times in passing and never in the best light. Despite it all, he could tell she absolutely loved him. _He's just misunderstood_ , Rey had explained once, _He's a good guy. I've always understood him even if he scared me sometimes. He's just lost and confused. No one ever had the patience to deal with him the way he needed. I tried..._ She had stopped there abruptly, as if she suddenly realized that she'd just aired one too many of her family's secrets. The younger man had done his best to change the subject at the time. He understood what it was like having things you don't want to talk about.

“I think we can go, Ben,” Rey said, leaning an elbow on the window sill. Finn held back a smile. He was sure she just rolled her eyes. For the first time, the driver moved to look at her and Finn got his first full glimpse at him. Finn’s mind raced: _No way, this has to be a joke, no way no way no way no way no way no..._ “My bad, I meant, we can go now, Kylo.”

The younger man suddenly lost track of his breathing and his heart was beating loudly in his chest. Finn's ears burned as the older man finally turned to look at him. A bolt of electricity went through his body as the same eyes he’d only seen on a phone screen look right into his. Sure, he hasn't shaved in a few days and his hair wasn't as luxurious as it was in the photo but there is no denying it's the same Kylo. _Oh, stars. Here it comes._ The older man examined him then simply scowled: “Put on your seatbelt.”

Finn is human enough to admit that he'd entertained the possibility of bumping into Kylo some day. It’s only natural. However, he’s got too much pride to admit that none of these possibilities ever included Kylo telling him to put something on.


	5. rain rain go away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was raining where I was if you couldn't tell! :)

_17:25_

**REY**

explain to me again why you’re texting me rather than just talking to me

**FINN**

Your cousin makes me nervous. 

I just have this weird feeling he’d listen to everything we say and silently judge us.

**REY**

omg you don’t have to be that self-conscious

i mean ben is the last person who has a right to judge other people lol

sorry ‘kylo’

**FINN**

If Kylo is the name he wants to be called by, then we should just respect it. 

I doubt he appreciates being mocked about it. After all, a person has a right to pick what they are called.

**REY**

???

why are you suddenly so defensive about it

**FINN**

I’m not being defensive. 

**REY**

is this about the fake name???

we can come clean about that if you want

**FINN**

No.

I don’t mind being Storm.

It’s actually kind of cool on second thought.

A re-brand might be just what I need, you know?

**REY**

???

no i don’t know

you’re not making any sense

**FINN**

I’m just saying, stop spitting out the name “Kylo” each time you say it, all right?

He really identifies with the name so he probably takes it as a personal attack each time. 

**REY**

i mean, you’re right and i’ve been teasing him kind of harshly about it and should let up a bit

but also it’s mad weird how you’re suddenly his #1 defender

**FINN**

???

I’m just trying to be respectful. That’s hardly being someone’s #1 defender.

An undeniably irritated voice shattered the silence. “Why don’t you two just talk to each other instead of texting?”

“We could,” Rey shrugged. “Does it make any difference to you?”

“No.” Kylo answered quickly. It’s the same voice, all right, but Finn can’t help but notice the slight change in fluidity and confidence that comes with speaking to someone you’re comfortable with. “It’s just weird listening to you two take turns furiously typing.”

“Oh, it’s starting to rain! Was it supposed to rain this weekend?” Rey ignored him completely as she gazed out the window. As Rey focused on the wet concrete outside, Finn noticed the other man’s slight reaction to the news of rain. He _was_ reading Finn’s messages. “I didn’t bring a raincoat or anything. Aunt Leia probably has a few extra umbrellas though.”

Finn began to open his mouth to let Rey know he’d packed rain gear but quickly closed it. It had taken what felt like an eternity to realize that Kylo didn’t recognize him. Couldn’t have possibly recognized him. He’d never seen him before. For all Kylo knew, the guy he was texting had big, oozing warts and bad body odor. However, Finn realized much to his detriment, Kylo _had_ heard him speak, even if it’s by phone. He’d managed to get Rey on board with texting while they were in the car but he was beginning to think that his “no talking in front of Kylo” plan was going to get exponentially more difficult over the weekend. Finn cleared his throat to speak: “I brought my raingear, Rey, so I’m good.”

Rey twirled around almost immediately to show Finn her raised eyebrow. “Uh, you okay there?”

Finn shook his head innocently. “Couldn’t be better.”

“You sound a little…” She motioned vaguely in the air, searching for the word. “Raspy.”

“I always get raspy when it rains,” he croaked. 

Thankfully, Kylo cut the conversation short as he pulled the car into the parking lot of a family restaurant. “You guys can stay here if you want and do bit it is you’re doing right now but I’m getting something to eat.”

_17:39_

**BEN**

What is up with ur friend

**REY**

he gets nervous easily around new people

he’s kind of shy

**BEN**

did he rlly not want anything to eat

[image]

this is the menu

I can order it now and bring it out to him 

If he doesn’t like eating in front of strangers 

or u can come inside and pick it up

**REY**

he said he’s fine

he probs ate, chugged a bunch of water & used the bathroom before we picked him up lol

he’d be too shy to say anything once we hit the road

he’s always doing stuff like that. like, really well disciplined, lots of restraint

**BEN**

Is he military or smth

**REY**

no

i think he hates to feel like an inconvenience 

just how he is

**BEN**

should i grab something just in case

For u?

**REY**

no, & i am kind of jet-lagged and the rain is so soothing, i keep nodding off

i really wanna take a nap

so i am gonna ask to switch seats w/my friend since the back is more comfy

just FYI for when you get back

“Rey?” Finn’s voice echoed slightly in the stillness. He looked in the back seat to find the young woman was soundly asleep, leaned back in the seat with only an over-sized sweatshirt for heat. He smiled affectionately as he managed to take his coat off and drape it over the small mass behind him. In reality, it was Poe’s jacket. He’d given it to Finn on a colder night and the younger man had just never gotten around to returning it. To be honest, he did like the jacket and that could be one of the factors that may have caused the delay. He also didn’t sense any urgency in getting it back to Poe since he’d assumed there would be plenty of opportunity going forward. 

Well, at least he had an excuse to talk to Poe at the party now.

The sound of the rain on the windshield and Rey’s soft, even breaths seemed to be the only noises in the world right now. It was getting dark outside and the sun was threatening to set at any moment. Finn let out a small disapproving noise as a pair of blinding head beams from the nearby road disturbed the twilight in the car. He hated the months filled with darkness. 

_18:01_

**FINN**

I hate it when it rains and it’s dark outside. 

I always feel so alone.

The one thing I want more than anything on days like this is to be in a warm, cozy bed with someone’s arms wrapped around me. 

Finn immediately regrets sending the message as the door to the driver’s seat opened. Kylo didn’t bother to look in the younger man’s direction and younger man's incredibly glad he doesn’t. He can’t confirm it for himself but the tips of his ears were probably emanating a fiery red glow at that moment. _Just start the car and go_ , Finn wished. Despite his wishing, he watched as Kylo took the phone out of his pocket and stared at the notifications. It was like an out of body experience to see the older man reading his message. Finn thought back to all the messages he'd sent Kylo and wondered if this is how he looked in those moments, too. The older man's pupils moved rapidly as he read and re-read the three little sentences over and over again. A wave of nausea swept over Finn as he was overcome by shame. He felt almost dirty watching the glow of the screen linger on Kylo's face without revealing his true identity. A minute went by where neither of them moved. Finn watched, careful not to stare too openly, as the older man opened his messages.

Finn’s breath hitched as fingers hovered over the keyboard.

He had to focus all his energy on keeping his breathing even in the mounting anticipation. 

_Nothing._

The other man doesn’t send anything, doesn’t even write and delete a message. Kylo switched his phone to sleep mode and stuffed it back into his pockets.

Finn wondered if this is how Kylo has been reacting to all his messages lately. 

“Aren’t you going to answer?” Finn finally asked as they peeled out of the parking lot, careful to keep his voice disguised as best as he could, 

“It’s none of your business,” was the gruff response. 

_What a cruel irony_ , he thought as he retreated back into himself. Once his stomach stopped churning, the younger man wondered what caused him to send the message in the first place. He knew he’d have to face Kylo eventually. When he laid it all out, it was manipulative and wrong to leverage their current situation to his advantage. Finn knew this, but deep down, a part of him didn’t care. It was the part of him that he fought against, drowned out and denied. The same part of him that made him sext with a stranger. The same part of him that got a sick sense of pleasure at the thought of Poe being jealous. The part of him that didn't miss Kylo. The part of him that's actually _so damn pissed off_ because he knows he didn't do anything to deserve this treatment. It was the part of him he tried to manage with routines, affirmations, and careful planning each day. 

The part of him he could never really control. 

_18:09_

**FINN**

Okay. I think I finally got the hint. I’ll stop messaging you. 

Just for old time's sake though...

Goodnight, Kylo.

Finn pretended to keep fiddling with his phone after sending the messages, even after the three tiny dings emanated from Kylo’s pocket as they pulled into the driveway. A perverted sense of justice burned itself into every recess of his mind. He wanted a reaction from Kylo. Something, anything to get him to just send one text to explain why Finn had been excommunicated without cause. He didn’t care if he had to be underhanded to get it. And when all was said and done, it wasn't really underhanded. Finn was tired of chasing Kylo for a reply. He figured (he couldn't pinpoint when) that, after all those sleepless nights and TMI discussions, he's at least entitled to a reason _why_. The moment the engine stilled, Finn exited the car. Suddenly, he didn't want to see Kylo's reaction. He swiftly opened the backseat door to gently wake Rey before grabbing his bags on the other side. On his way around the car, he passed behind Kylo, without an umbrella and collecting raindrops in his hair, who stood assessing Rey's luggage. The older man's hand threatened to reach into his pocket but after a moment, he opted to grab the luggage instead.

“I got it, Ben,” Rey yawned from the backseat, slowly getting up and draping Poe’s jacket over her head for protection against the ever increasing downpour. She glanced at Finn, who was still fiddling with his duffel in the backseat, through the rear windshield before returning to her recipient. “Sorry. I meant Kylo. I’m still getting used to it.”

Kylo looked at Finn, a note of confusion playing on his features, but didn’t say anything. The other man averted his eyes as he slung his the duffel over his shoulder and rushed to help Rey with her larger bag. Kylo remained behind as the younger pair ran for the shelter of the front porch, seemingly inspecting the car for anything the younger two had missed in their rush. Finn watched Kylo as he and Rey waited for someone to open the door. 

Rey was saying something, but he wasn’t listening. His eyes were trained on the other man reaching into his pocket and looking at his phone. Kylo was tall and imposing, so tall and imposing that his presence could probably fill a room, but in that moment, he looked small and defenseless. A blast of warmth distracted Finn for a moment, as sudden light spilled into the dusk. There were greetings happening next to him that would soon require his attention but he tried till the very last moment not to take his eyes off the dark figure still standing motionlessly behind the car. 

“Come in, come in, you two must be freezing. Where is Ben? What’s he doing over there? On his phone?” Rey’s aunt ushered the two into the house. In a vain attempt for one last glimpse, Finn tried to look over the older woman’s shoulder. She wasn’t a large woman but she occupied the whole frame, a hand on each side of the jamb as she leaned out to shout. “Get in here, Ben, you’ll catch a cold!” 

Like a creature from a horror movie, Kylo entered the house a sopping, disheveled mess. His brow was furrowed in a mix of anger and contemplation as he stomped up the stairs without bothering to return his mom’s greeting. 

Rey’s aunt had just begun to apologize for his behavior when the door slammed, shaking the whole house in its wake.


	6. Chapter 6

_22:10_

**REY**

do you like your room

**FINN**

Yeah, it’s almost as big as my apartment.

**REY**

that says more about your apartment than the room tbh ):

my aunt and uncle really like you

**FINN**

Both of them?

Because your uncle is kind of intense.

**REY**

he’s normally really cool

but since dad entered the seminary, he’s gotten it into his head that he needs to take over the role of being an over-the-top 80s film dad

which means he must establish an antagonistic relationship with any guy i talk with

**FINN**

That explains dinner.

**REY**

yeah sorry about that. thanks for letting him win the arm wrestling match tho

he never did this when ben would bring guys home

**FINN**

He actually won fair and square.

Your cousin brought guys home?

**REY**

yuuuuup. sometime in his 2nd yr of uni he was kicked out of the dorms and had to commute from home the rest of the year

my room used to be the guest room too so you can imagine how awkward it was to share a wall AND a bathroom with all that at 13

**FINN**

I can’t even begin to imagine the kind of guys he’d bring home.

**REY**

he definitely had a ✨type✨

**FINN**

Which was…?

**REY**

absolute assholes 

**FINN**

Oh. Wow.

Don’t know what I was expecting, to be honest.

**REY**

well, there was a guy he dated for like 6 months who was nice. he was almost normal during that time

then he took a course with this prof and he just started to...idk, be more closed off and moody than his baseline

i just remember my aunt and uncle were really worried about him around that time

his whole life became just school and work

**FINN**

Sorry. I don’t mean to pry.

**REY**

it’s okay. it kind of feels good to talk about it since everyone else just kind of ignores it

i don’t think aunt leia cares much what he does anymore as long as he returns her calls and visits home sometimes

_22:20_

**FINN**

Can I ask what he does for work? 

Or study, I guess.

If that’s too personal, it’s okay.

**REY**

it’s not personal info lol. 

but aren’t we curious about ben tonight, hmmm! 

we should talk tomorrow, don’t think i didn’t see you staring

**FINN**

It’s not like that. I’m just kind of curious. 

You can’t tell me you wouldn’t be if you met someone like him.

**REY**

lol ok sure sure

he studies military tactic and history & from what i gather his job is hanging around in a cramped basement and combs over old books and documents

**FINN**

Does he still hang around that professor?

**REY**

“curious” as an excuse only goes so far!! 

but yeah, he’s his doctoral adviser now. 

he's kind of a big wig in the field but he’s pushing ben way too hard as his ““protege”” and that’s probs why his anxiety is always spiraling. 

**FINN**

Why does he put up with that?

**REY**

idk

i guess he gives ben the validation he wants. probably a lot of clout in being mentored by a giant in the field too

**FINN**

That gives a lot of context to his personality.

**REY**

yeah, expect most people don’t bother to stick around to get it

so anyways what do you want to know next about him? his favorite color? boxers or briefs? favorite pasta? 

**FINN**

It really, really wasn’t like that. 

**REY**

lol riiiight

i'm going to sleep now. night bby <3

Finn had never been a deep sleeper but the sound of shattering glass was loud enough that it would have probably woken him up even if he was.

 _Of course, he knew where the noise came from._ He waited in his bed, upright and listening intently, for the rest of the house to stir, for three sets of footsteps to rush to the door next his own, bang loudly, and look for signs that the occupant of the room was okay. After a minute of silence though, it set in that no one was coming. _They're probably all used to this._ The thought passed through his mind quickly as he sat and debated. If Rey or Kylo's parents weren’t rushing into the room then it definitely didn't make any sense for him to go bursting in there. He glanced at the door to the bathroom that connected their rooms. He’d check the door to the older man’s room: if it was locked, he’d go back to his bed and act like nothing happened but _if it’s unlocked_...Finn tried the door. It creaked as it revealed the other man hunched on the edge of his bed.

The source of the noise -- a shattered vase -- laid on the floor nearby. 

The older man didn’t react to the new presence in the room, choosing instead to continue staring blankly at a nondescript spot on the floor. “Are you okay?” The younger man stood with his back firmly against the door. A nervous hand clutched the doorknob behind his back for support. “Kylo?”

The older man finally seemed to notice him although Finn was sure he'd been aware the whole time. Kylo was staring openly now, his mind trying to work out a puzzle. Finn repeated his question to fill the emptiness but Kylo ignored it. “Rey said you’re someone with a lot of restraint and discipline."

He tried to remember when Rey had ever said that about him. Not just in front of Kylo, but ever. It wasn't how he'd have described himself. “She did?” 

“Do disciplined and well-restrained people usually come into people’s rooms in the middle of the night?” 

Finn shrugged halfheartedly. “People are usually curious about things that go bang in the night.” 

“No one else is here but you," Kylo deadpanned.

“Did something happen?"

The other man continued his silent examination. Finn's tight grasp on the doorknob became slippery with sweat. “Earlier in the car when Rey called me by my birth name, she looked at you before correcting herself. Why?”

“I wouldn’t know,” he lied in response. 

The soft sound of sheets returning to their place mingled with firm steps as Kylo closed the distance between them. He stopped just short of his target to slowly extended his arms towards the door behind Finn, framing the younger man between them. That same feral quality Finn had noticed on their phone call crept into Kylo’s voice, “From the moment you got in the car, I noticed you staring at me.”

“Was I staring?” Finn tried to keep his voice steady. He had been.

“You were. Constantly, unrelenting.”

Kylo’s eyes fell to Finn’s mouth and he closed the small gap between them, pressing his lips against Finn’s. There was a touch of hesitancy in his motion, as if he expected Finn to react or recoil. Finn agrees he should do one or the other, except the younger man didn’t know how he was supposed to react. There wasn’t a single instinct to push the older man away so for a few moments, he let Kylo continue to dominate his mouth, letting him part his lips, allowing his tongue to survey the landscape. He'd done this before - not a lot but enough times that he should know how to act when kissed - so once Finn was able to process _what the hell_ _was happening_ , he began to respond. Finn, who had spent his entire relationship with Kylo trying to avoid this exact situation, was now kissing him, and to both his horror and his pleasure, it was everything he didn’t know he was missing in his life. The feeling was exhilarating and Finn’s angry at himself for ever putting this off. 

When he'd recovered enough composure, he guided his hands to Kylo’s hips. Finn was beginning to realize all those messages Kylo sent could become a reality and his face flushed. “The person you were texting,” Finn sucked in air sharply as Kylo’s icy hand went up his shirt and made contact with the skin on his chest. “What's their name?” 

“Finn,” he said the name with a pleasurable sigh. He pressed their bodies closer and with his other hand, he drew small circles near Finn’s temples. As if activated by the name, his mouth became increasingly demanding, more aggressive, begging the younger man to react more to him. 

Kylo released Finn’s lip and laid a trail to his neck. When the older man sunk his teeth into the sensitive skin of Fin’s neck, the younger man let out a loud, involuntary gasp. Encouraged by the reaction, the older man kept sucking and biting. Finn was sure they’d leave marks as a reminder this wasn't a dream. Both of Kylo's hands had found their way up Finn’s back, lukewarm and rough against his own, and as the older man bit down for the hundredth time, he sunk his nails in and dragged them downward. Finn shuddered and clung to Kylo as his knees became weak. His breath was ragged as he spoke. “Pretend I'm him. What have you wanted to do to him?” Finn asked between the other man’s continuous nips. “Everything you’ve ever wanted to do to him, do it to me. What do you want from me, Kylo?"

Kylo immediately grabbed the other man’s wrists and pinned them above his head. He began grinding his hips into Finn's. The younger man felt Kylo’s hardness against his own and trembled in pleasure. “Tell me you like me more than Poe, _”_ Kylo breathed against his throat, rough and needy. “Tell me you only want me.”

“I only want you, Kylo.” Finn repeated, overwhelmed in a way he’d never felt before. In his fugue state, he only vaguely registered the command and Poe's name.

If he had any control over himself in that moment, Finn might have realized what he was saying. All of his attention was focused on Kylo: the eyes that were looking at him as if he was the only person that ever mattered, the hands that never seemed to stop moving, the lips that worshiped every spot they touched, the hips that were threatening to make Finn come fully clothed. He leaned in to the older man for support as he felt himself faltering, resting his head to hear the faint beating of a heart. There were times when Finn was up late at night, where he'd stare at the images Kylo had sent him. First one then the other, then back and forth a few times until he decided which one he was in the mood for. Then he'd lay down, one of the images open on a carefully placed phone, and resolve to pretend the next morning that he didn't do what he did. Even with just the images and messages from Kylo, it was different but he could never have imagined just being touched by the real thing would be so intoxicating. There was so much sensation, things he’d never felt when he was with anyone else. He leaned into the increasing entropy, not wanting to think, to forget where he was, who he was, how he got here. He wanted for once in his life to let go and give in. So when Finn opened his mouth to speak again, he didn’t know where the words came from or who was saying them. _“_ Damnit. I love you, Kylo.” 

In class, Finn had learned that the only way the entropy of one system can decrease is when it interacts with some other system whose entropy increases in the process. 

That’s a law. So when Finn was reaching his peak, it shouldn't have surprised him when Kylo froze.

He also shouldn't have been shocked when Kylo stepped away from the younger man like he’d been burned. In his state, Finn didn’t notice anything wrong until a draft rolled across his burning flesh. _Oh, crap._ He was being stared at as if he were an alien. _Oh, crap,_ Finn thought again as the last minute played back in his head. Mortification set in quickly. He’d just told Kylo he loved him. Scratch that, _Rey's weird friend that he just met today_ told Kylo he loved him.

 _Oh, stars._ Finn would wrestle with himself on why he said it later. Right now, the only thing he could focus on was making the mad dash to his own room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a chapter at least


	7. Chapter 7

_11:15_

**REY**

if you’re hungry, aunt leia made you a plate

**FINN**

Thanks. Sorry to miss breakfast.

I didn’t realize how tired I was.

**REY**

yeah, don’t worry about it

& she wanted me to apologize for last night

**FINN**

What do you mean? I don’t remember her doing anything.

**REY**

you must have heard ben’s 

uh

thing

**FINN**

Oh, the vase?

**REY**

how did you know it was a vase

**FINN**

Just what it sounded like. 

**REY**

he does stuff like that when he’s frustrated or upset or if mars is in retrograde or it’s tuesday

usually if it’s only the one thing we ignore it

in the mood he was in driving up, i guess i should have warned you

Finn stopped himself from admitting that Kylo’s mood yesterday was entirely his fault.

_11:16_

**FINN**

It’s fine. It didn’t bother me at all. 

**REY**

cool, i’ll let her know. 

me and uncle han are going into the little town nearby, it’s cute and he promised ice cream

**FINN**

Ice cream, you say?

I’ll be down in 5. 

“What’s with the scarf?” Rey asked as Finn came down the stairs. 

“I’m a little cold,” he lied. When Finn was sure the coast was clear, he’d gone into the bathroom to wash his face, only to notice various pieces of evidence of the night before across his neck. “Where is your uncle?”

“He’s helping Aunt Leia in the garden, something about raised flower beds,” she shrugged. Something else was clearly on her mind though, if the glint in her eye is anything to go by. “So about those texts last night…”

Finn put one finger up as if to settle it once and for all. “It was natural curiosity!” 

“Who are you fooling?” she laughed and punched his arm playfully. “‘Your cousin’s brought guys home?’ That is not even remotely a normal question someone asks about a stranger.” She threw up her arms in exasperation, “It’s okay to have feelings, Finn!”

He shushed her and glanced to make sure Kylo wasn’t around. “Remember what my name is supposed to be?” he said in a low whisper.

“I swear, this mountain air is causing you to go nuts,” she eyed her friend with a confused smile. “What is going on with you?”

Rey was right. Something was going on with him. Something that made him do and say stupid things. Finn didn’t know when it started — maybe it was when Kylo first started texting him, or when Kylo first stopped texting him, or maybe it was when he first actually _saw_ Kylo — but he’s less in control than usual and it was all Kylo’s fault. The latter came as a shock sometime between the 3rd and 4th time he’d attempted to get some sleep last night. What he wasn't able to pinpoint was _when_ he’d lost that control — after all, it was Finn who’d withheld his name, face, interests, work, hobbies. It was _Kylo_ who was an open book. It was _Kylo_ who was always engaging, always wanting more, always chasing. It suddenly occurred to Finn that maybe Kylo, without realizing it, had finally caught him and now Finn had no clue what to do. He had never been caught before. Awe-stuck? _Frequently._ Unsure? _Of course._ Confused? _All the time._

But never at a loss of words or what to do. _He always had an escape strategy._ “I’m just...reeling from a few things, I think.”

“Oh,” There was a realization in her voice. “Are you worried about having to face Poe tomorrow?”

“Oh fuck,” He’d totally forgotten. “ _Poe_.”

“Don’t worry, dude,” Rey put a reassuring arm around him. “It’s not as bad as you think it’s going to be.”

“Yeah,” he muttered absentmindedly. He’d completely forgotten that the party tomorrow would be swimming with his and Rey’s friends who had a habit of saying his name a little too much. Although he was almost certain that Kylo would be locked in his room the whole time, Rey's aunt would definitely try to see to it that Kylo mingle a little and Finn had to be ready for it. “Speaking of which, where is your cousin? I heard him shower and leave pretty early this morning.”

There was a sly grin on the young woman’s face. “Uncle Han made him cut some firewood after breakfast. After last night, he thought he should take his aggression out on something that actually need to be broken.”

“Oh, right,” Finn nodded. So, he calculated, if they leave the house now, they could avoid him entirely. Finn would suggest a lunch in town, then some further sightseeing, delaying their return home until dinner where afterward he would steal away to his room to retire early. He exhaled a little deeper with his next breath. Having a plan always made him feel better. 

“Speaking of which, I am gonna go check on what is keeping Uncle Han,” she said, making her way towards the backdoor. Her fading voice traveled from the other room, “He said it would only take a minute.”

“Okay, I’ll just wait here,” Finn shouted but Rey didn’t respond. “She’s probably outside already,” he said to himself with a shrug. 

With all the excitement since he first got here, Finn had never gotten a chance to really look around the place where Rey had grown up. It was nicer than any of the homes he’d ever lived in — hell, most of them didn’t have such a well-decorated foyer, much less a foyer. The military academy he eventually got a scholarship to didn’t provide much in the way of comfort either but it was a thousand times better than being shuffled from house to house, family to family, every few months. He’d also excelled in the academy, too, and that gave him a much needed sense of purpose and identity. After a childhood of uncertainty and vagueness, he had liked the discipline and the structure. He liked knowing exactly what he had to do to earn praise. More than anything, Finn liked the academy's philosophy of practicality over sentimentality, logic over emotion, _scientia et sapientia._ He didn't have many friends, but it didn't matter: he'd graduated top of his class with a seemingly bright future ahead of him. His first major disappointment only came afterward, in his first year in the Army, where he realized he was too emotional, too sentimental, too sensitive, too _everything he-didn't-want-to-be_ to be a solider. He muddled along for another two years, assigned to the worst duties despite his record, until he decided he would go back to school. He still excelled, but competing with people four years younger than him, who all seemed to have grown up in a different world than him, made him self-conscious in a way he'd never felt before.

Despite it all, Finn saw the silver lining. He never would have met Rey or Poe or Rose or Jessika or Snap or any of his friends if he had forced himself to stay in the Army. He smiled to himself. S _ometimes things work out even if they don't go according to plan_. 

“Hey.”

Finn looked up, reacting more to the break in silence than the fact he was being addressed, to find Kylo closing the front door in front of him. The older man was shimmying out of a pair of muddy boots, and making quick work of unbuttoning his plaid overcoat. He was sweating, bits of hair sticking to his skin, stark against the red flush of his face. Finn nodded in his direction, grateful at the seemingly normal atmosphere, but desperately hoped that Rey would hurry back before the topic of last night came up. “Kylo.”

“I’m glad I caught you,” Kylo said, taking the coat off and hanging it on a hook near the door. He closed in on Finn, towering over him. “I want to talk to you.”

“Look, about that, it was just —” Finn stopped speaking as Kylo’s attention turned towards the next room. In the distance, the back door slammed and the pair could hear Han and Rey’s indistinct chatter approaching. Kylo grabbed Finn by the upper arm, and in a swift motion opened the nearby hallway closet and pulled Finn into it. Kylo reached just beyond Finn to turn on a dim light. “What are you doing?”

Outside the conversation became clearer: ( _“He was just here a second ago!” they heard Rey say. “Well, maybe he’s in the bathroom.” Han replied._ )

Kylo finally spoke, ignoring the people outside the door. “When you said it, you sounded exactly like him.”

Finn cocked his head in confusion. “When I said what I sounded like who?” 

“When you said, ‘I love you’, you sounded just like Finn,” a note of excitement crept into Kylo’s voice. He closed his eyes. “Say it again.”

“No.” It came out more defensively than he wanted but there was no way Finn was doing this again. Just thinking about the night before — Kylo moaning his name with a look of pleasure on his face and how he'd completely lost himself — made him flush. He cursed himself for not being more careful about his voice as he reached for the door, using Kylo’s current state as an opportunity to make his escape. “Look, I was just caught up in the moment.”

With his eyes still sealed tightly, the older man’s arm reached to push the door closed again. A brief period of time passed where neither of them moved before Kylo finally returned the arm to his side again. The taller man was rigid but his hands were curled into loose fists that threatened to quiver in the mounting anticipation. The younger man didn’t miss the desperation of the older man’s voice either: “Please.” 

_Aw, damnit._

“I love you, Kylo,” he recited quickly. It came out as one continuous word and with downcast eyes, the statement was directed towards a pair of Han’s old shoes rather than Kylo. “Happy now?”

As he spoke, Finn’s gaze found its way to Kylo’s face. There was a calmness to his features that was beguiling. Even the deep, even breaths the older man was settling into were beginning to seem melodic. It was like the older man was in a meditative state and despite every instinct that was telling him to go, Finn was transfixed. _Just because I said I love you._ There was a flutter in Finn’s stomach at the idea. In his spellbound state and with the general lack of space, Finn didn’t have any time to react when Kylo moved in to embrace him. The older man rested his cheek against Finn’s head. “Say it again.”

Finn obliged and this time he said it slower, tasting the words. “I love you, Kylo.” 

“Again,” Kylo repeated, and Finn complied. 

_Again. Again. Again. Again. Again._

“No,” Finn finally said after what felt like the hundredth time repeating himself. 

“Why not?” Kylo didn’t release him but he shifted himself so he could stare into his companion’s eyes. “You didn’t have any trouble last night.”

If Finn didn't know any better, he could have sworn he was being mocked. “Do you do this with every guy who says I love you in the heat of the moment?”

“If they sounded like who you sounded like, I would.” 

Irritation bubbled inside Finn. He couldn't believe _this_ was the kind of guy that had managed to upend his perfectly peaceful existence. “You are _such_ a weirdo.”

Finn noticed Kylo’s eyes widen imperceptibly. Ah, shoot, he’s said too much. _I should apologize,_ he sighed internally but before Finn could get an apology out, Kylo deepened his embrace. “Say that again.”

Finn’s voice was muffled against the taller man’s chest. “You’re kidding me, right?” 

“Of course not.”

“I’m not saying anything anymore. I’m going to go,” Finn tried to peel himself away from Kylo. “I don't get you at all, you know? One day, you're moody and mysterious and then the next you're like this, it's so —”

A burst of cold air hit Finn’s exposed cheek before light burned into the eye that wasn’t buried into Kylo’s chest. “He hasn’t been feeling well, maybe he went outside for a walk? Which jacket did you…” _Oh, fuck._ The voice trailed off but he’d heard enough to recognize Rey before his eye made its way to her face. “Want.”

“Just grab any one of them,” Han’s disembodied voice shouted from the next room. 

Rey stared hard at the pair, the desire to know _what the heck is going on here_ apparent on her face. Finn felt Kylo shift and grab something off a hook. Behind Finn’s back, Kylo offered the jacket to Rey, who accepted it without breaking her scrutiny. “We’re _definitely_ going to talk later,” she whispered to Finn quickly before shutting the door. They heard Han’s heavy footsteps approach and a faint conversation through the door ( _“Should we try to find him? It’s easy to get lost in the backwoods”_ to which Rey responds, _“I think he knows exactly where he’s going.”_ ) before the pair in the closet hear the front door shut.

With the superhuman strength and clarity afforded by embarrassment, Finn managed to get out of Kylo’s grasp, up the stairs and into his room where he was determined to stay until he could get a ride back into the city tomorrow with someone who wasn’t a part of the Skywalker-Organa-Solo family.


	8. Chapter 8

_12:10_

**REY**

ok it’s time to come out now

i just wanna have a friendly little chat with you abt a few things

**FINN**

It wasn’t what it looked like. 

**REY**

finally! a response!

now just come out and say it to my face

**FINN**

I don’t think I could even say it to your shoe right now.

If you can’t tell, I’m extremely embarrassed.

**REY**

i walked in on my best friend and my cousin in a closet in my aunt and uncle’s house 

so

i kinda get it?

**FINN**

Can’t I just barricade myself in this room until it’s time to go home?

**REY**

omg it’s not that serious, finn! 

it’s just kind of shocking. like 0 to 60 shocking.

i mean, i knew that you were *kinda* into ben

**FINN**

I guess it’s kinda moot to deny it now.

**REY**

please tell me that reply means you’re seeing the humor in this now

**FINN**

The only humor I’m feeling is black bile.

**REY**

????

**FINN**

Melancholia. 

**REY**

omg you’re being so dramatic, i love it

you’re usually so calm and put together and now come to find out you’re the hickey-having (lots of them too!), hanky-panky in the closet type! 

**FINN**

I’m literally buried in sheets right now, trying to disappear. 

**REY**

now that i recall all your clothes were on

did i interrupt you two before the good part

**FINN**

Is there a hole nearby that I can crawl into and die?

**REY**

this is too much fun!! i feel like i am seeing a new side of you

i think our friendship may have just leveled up?

**FINN**

If I come out, will it be to unrelenting torture?

**REY**

i’ll pretend like it didn’t happen, pinky promise

anyways aunt leia was so worried because this is the third meal you’ve skipped so at least come down for a snack before the party

**FINN**

Okay, I’m coming out now.

**REY**

hey wait a sec

**FINN**

?

**REY**

that means that yesterday was the second time you’ve come out of the closet

**FINN**

Just come get me when the party starts! 

**REY**

it was worth it looool

i love u <3 

The party wasn’t going nearly as bad as Finn thought it would. For one, Kylo had decided to lock himself in his room, a blessing in and of itself, and Jannah and Rose were more than willing to act as shields so long as they got all the messy details of his break-up from Poe in return. All in all, if he could make it through the next two hours he was home free. Almost home free, at least...Finn couldn't help but notice Poe’s furtive glances at him from the moment he arrived, brimming with eagerness and almost screaming ' _I have something to tell you.'_

 _Of course he does,_ the young man groaned to himself. It was time to rip the bandage off and bite the bullet. 

“Hey,” Finn said, sheepishly just as Poe finished his goodbye to another party guest.

“Hi,” the older man replied, matching his tone. “I thought maybe you were avoiding me.”

“No, just incredibly embarrassed,” he replied. “Glad you’re even willing to talk to me.”

“It happens to the best of us, too,” the older man chuckled. Finn returned the smile. “Look, I hope you and um, Kylo? Kylo, I think. I hope it works out for you both.”

“Oh,” Finn responded, dumbfounded. Damnit, he even remembered the name. “It’s probably not going to work out at all. He’s, um, _wow_ , this is embarrassing. He, uh...actually ghosted me pretty soon after that.”

“Wow,” Poe spit part of his drink out, holding back astounded laughter. “That's awful.” 

Finn gave a crooked, embarrassed smile. “If you wanted schadenfreude, you got it.” 

“No, no,” he replied, quickly and seriously. “I am just shocked. I mean, you know how I feel about you. I can’t imagine someone ghosting you of all people.”

The younger man smiled, gently. “Thanks, Poe.”

The older man returned the expression and reached out to firmly grasp the younger man’s arm. “It’s just the truth, Finn.”

Suddenly, the older man drew back with a chill. Finn raised an eyebrow in response, “Everything okay?”

“Uh, yeah,” he responded, a note of confusion in his voice. “I just got this weird chill down my spine.”

Finn, returning Poe’s gesture, touched the other man’s arm in concern. “Are you cold? Do you want to go inside? I have your jacket upstairs and I’ve been meaning to give it back.”

Poe shivered again at the touch. “There it goes again,” he laughed, nervously. “I wish I could say this is all in my head.”

“That what was all in your head?”

“That someone is definitely staring daggers at me.”

“This place is full of our friends though,” Finn looked around, noticing Jannah, Rey, and Rose's curious but definitely harmless glances at the pair. “I can’t think of a single person here who’d have it out for you.”

_13:45_

**JANNAH**

OMG. Are we seeing a reconciliation before our eyes?

**ROSE**

He shivers each time Finn touches him. Now that’s what I call **💖** Romance **💖**

**REY**

arrrrgh 

i have something i want to tell you all but i can’t!!!!

**JANNAH**

He let us know about the details of the break-up & weird text friend earlier. 

Is that it? Because I am SHOCKED you were able to keep that a secret so long. 

**JESSIKA**

wait, what text friend?? i only know they broke up for Reasons???

hello??? why am i the only one with no details when i was the one that broke the break up news initially???

**REY**

there's! even! More!!!!

**JANNAH**

There is MORE? That was already SO MUCH. 

I am still getting over that this is what our sweet Finn does in the Shadows. 

**JESSIKA**

ok, low point in my life, being ignored in the group chat

can i get A CRUMB OF CONTEXT pls

 **ROSE**  
@Rey: Okay but just tell us and we will not say anything?

**JANNAH**

Actually, I can’t promise that. 

@Jessika: Finn struck up some weird ass friendship with a wrong number, like deep and intimate stuff, which led to his break up with Poe somehow. He was cagey about that part.

**REY**

it’s killing me

why did i swear to secrecy

but it’s safe to say that finn will NOT be reconciling with poe 

**ROSE**

Wait, what? C’mon now, why say anything if you’re not going to SAY anything? **😭**

**JESSIKA**

@Jannah: thank u but also HUH

**ROSE**

Omg, peel yourself away from whatever Sports you are doing over there and I'll fill you in.

**JESSIKA**

ok, i actually just won. and you all are NOT subtle, stop staring at them so intensely

uhhhhhh speaking of which, @Rey, who tf is that dude creepily looking through the blinds at finn & poe

peep the second story, middle window

**REY**

ladies, that right there is the plot twist 😫

**JANNAH**

...

NO WAY 🥴

**ROSE**

!!!!

UR KIDDING **😳**

**JESSIKA**

HUH

gotdamnit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year all. short but penultimate chapter, next one will be the last!


	9. Chapter 9

_14:03_

**HAN**

Ben’s out of his room and talking to three

Count em 3

Girls

That’s My boy

**LEIA**

You’re insufferable.

**HAN**

That’s why

U married me ?

**LEIA**

Yes, that’s exactly why. I’m a masochist.

**HAN**

Really why is this first i’m hearing 

that s sexy

**LEIA**

It was sarcasm, you dolt. 

**HAN**

Do you think i should give ben THHE TALK

**LEIA**

He’s 29 and gay.

**HAN**

So Yes>

**LEIA**

No.

“So, you’re Rey’s cousin?” Rose smiled, clutching tighter to Jannah’s arm, trying not to let on how terrifying the man in front of her was. “We’ve heard _a lot_ about you and I mean, _a lot_.”

Jannah nudged Rose in the ribs. “All good things, of course.”

“Right,” Kylo replied absentmindedly, stealing glances at Finn, Rey, and Poe as they laughed in the distance. “What can you tell me about Poe?”

“Poe?” Jessika piqued. “Where to start? Super nice guy.”

“Really smart,” Jannah added, turning to Jessika, who bobbed her head in agreement. “Oh, and athletic.”

If the girls were looking at the older man’s face, they’d have noticed the slight twitch of the eye each time they sang a praise to the pilot. 

“All in all, just a total dreamboat,” Rose nodded. She continued her list even as a dark storm playing across Kylo’s face intensified: “Outgoing, personable. Everyone likes him. Oh, and he volunteers at the children’s hospital every --”

“I get it, that’s enough,” he growled. Rose took a step back at the outburst and Jannah put a protective arm around her. The older man caught himself and took a breath, the corner of his mouth twitching upward until it turned into something resembling a strained half-smile. “I mean, thank you. I don’t need to know anything else.” 

“Uh, okay,” Rose responded, warily. “Why do you want to know about Poe anyways?”

“No particular reason,” the older man replied, his eyes trained again on the trio in the distance. “Just curious.”

 _There’s definitely a reason_ , all three girls thought in unison, thoroughly unconvinced by whatever nonchalant air the man in front of them was trying to put on.

A moment of silence passed before Rose indicated they should go join their friends in the distance. “Well, uh, it was nice to meet you, um,” Jessika searched for his name. “I think Rey mentioned before your name was Ben, right? Right?”

The older man’s eyes narrowed, as if he was debating something, and Jessika frowned to stop herself from rolling her eyes. _Okay, so he definitely wasn’t listening_ , she thought as waited for the older man to reach whatever conclusion he needed to reach. “I have one last question.” 

“Sure,” Jannah replied for the group, hesitant. “Go ahead.”

He looked the young woman who responded in the eye and for a moment, Jannah thought she could see a little bit of the older man’s appeal in that intense, _you’re-the-only-person-that-exists-right-now_ stare. “Can Poe fight?”

The small trio blinked in unison, smiled, and one-by-one politely offered an iteration of ‘ _I really wouldn’t know, sorry!’_ With great effort between the three of them, they just barely managed to leave off the _‘Why the hell do you want to know?’_

_14:20_

**JANNAH**

That was Finn’s new guy…?

I mean, he’s over 6 ft tall...that’s nice...I guess...

**JESSIKA**

his deep baritone voice is a plus…??

**ROSE**

He’s cute...in an avant-garde way…???

**JESSIKA**

he’s related to rey, so we know his family is cool…????

**JANNAH**

And I think he doesn’t want to actually murder Poe.

Just beat him to a pulp or something along those lines.

Shows restraint. Totally good vibes from that! 

**ROSE**

HES SO WEIRD GUYS

**JESSIKA**

that may be incredibly, undeniably, 100% without a doubt TRUE but we need to be supportive of finn!! 

we love him and if this is His Guy then he’s Our Guy too!!!! 

**JANNAH**

Jess’ right.

Finn is like the smartest, most responsible person we know...

So there has to be something to this guy we aren’t seeing. 

**ROSE**

I hate it when you guys make sense, ugh. 

I guess as long as Finn is happy, I’m happy. 

**JANNAH**

Where did that guy stalk off to anyways?

**ROSE**

He went inside, I think. 

**JESSIKA**

well, good news for poe i guess lol

**ROSE**

Maybe not though. 🧐

He could be getting a folding chair to attack with, WWE smackdown style.

**JANNAH**

He’s definitely a heel!! 😂

Poe’d kick his ass though. This guy looks like a giant baby, lol. 

_ROSE and JESSIKA liked a message._

Finn couldn’t focus at all on what Rey and Poe were talking about. He had been too busy monitoring Kylo's face and the back of Jannah, Jessika and Rose’s heads to gauge their reactions. _Of course_ , Kylo would choose now to act completely out of character and be sociable. The young man took a sip of his drink. _Yet he still can’t text me back, huh?_ he thought before the world came back in focus. Jess, Rose and Jannah were approaching and he had a mission. 

He needed to be strategic. He’d managed to get the conservation between Rey and Poe away from anything that would remotely mention Kylo. Poe knows Kylo’s name, Rey knows Kylo is her cousin. If Rey mentions Kylo, there is no way Poe _wouldn’t_ ask questions because what are the chances of two people being named fucking Kylo? From there, it’s just a skip and a hop to Question Town from both of them and mentally, he didn’t want to make the trip. Controlling the conversation so far had been easy - he knew the pieces of the puzzle Poe and Rey could connect but Jannah, Jessika, and Rose speaking to Kylo wasn't something he'd factored into this. He'd need to think on his feet.

“Hello, hello, everyone!” Jessika chirped. She smiled at the younger man, a bit too mischievously for his comfort. “We just had a chat with --”

“Rey’s cousin!” Finn cut in. “You had a chat, over there, with Rey’s cousin. We saw. I mean, I saw.”

All five of his friends stared at him as if he were unhinged. “Yes, we were talking to Rey’s cousin,” Jessika continued. She looked directly at Finn, nodded slowly and spoke even slower, enunciating each word slowly like Finn had trouble understanding human speech, “Rey’s cousin Ben.”

 _Ben._ Did he introduce himself as Ben to them? “Yes, right, her cousin _Ben_. That’s his name. _Ben_.”

Rey swallowed her drink quickly, eager to chime in. “Actually, he’s going by Ky---”

“Kind of a phase! He’s going by kind of phase right now,” Finn intercepted. His voice became quiet as he noticed Rey’s raised eyebrow. Finn flashed a pleading look at the younger woman. “So maybe let’s be sensitive and change the subject?” 

“I’m sorry, but is there alcohol at this party that I don’t know about?” Jannah said after a beat of silence. “Because I’ve never seen you like this, Finn, but then again, I’ve never seen you drunk so I have to assume you are drunk.” 

“No, he’s perfectly sober,” Rey said. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that she’s spilled too much as it is. “But we do have liquor in the house.”

“You’re not old enough to drink,” Poe said, raising an eyebrow. 

“Don’t be such a cop,” Jessika waved him off. She turned back towards Rey, “Lead us the booze and a secluded spot in these woods to get wasted away from auntie and uncle.”

“I think I’ll see what Snap, Han and his buddies are up to instead,” the pilot laughed. 

“Suit yourself!” Jessika sang. “You in, Finn?”

“Uh, I think I’m actually going to lie down for a bit,” he replied. “Not feeling well.”

“Ah, bummer,” she hummed, sympathetically. “Well, we’re off. Give us a ring if you feel better later!”

Well, that was a lot easier but also a lot more excruciating than Finn expected. He said his goodbye to Poe and decided he wasn’t lying: he was tired. With Jannah getting drunk in the woods, he’d probably lost his ride until tomorrow morning - they’re not going to be in any condition to drive. 

Finn slipped into the house. There was an eerie but comforting quiet compared to the clattering of dishes and laughter of the backyard. 

Poe and Snap would be sober and he could always get a ride from them. He actually didn’t know Snap that well, and while he was sure the older man would agree, Finn didn’t feel right asking him for a ride like that. It was still a little awkward with Poe but he could be in a car with him if it meant getting away from here ASAP. He did still have to give Poe back his jacket so he could ask then for a ride ---

Finn was pulled from both his thoughts and physically as he approached the stairs. His heart began to race at the sudden flurry of activity and he struggled against his assailant. Despite the scuffle, the other man managed to pull Finn into a now very familiar hallway closet. 

A small light -- the same one Finn remembered from yesterday -- flickered on and illuminated Kylo’s impassive face. The younger man almost screamed.

“What the hell are you doing?” he shouted. Then, realizing someone could stumble on them (again), he whispered harshly, “You scared the shit out of me!”

“Why do you keep talking to him?” Kylo asked, ignoring Finn’s question. There was an accusation in his voice that Finn couldn’t quite track down. 

The other man narrowed his eyes, trying to decide if he was confused or incredulous. “What?” 

“Every chance you get, you chat him up.”

“ _Who_ ,” Finn stressed the word sharply, pinching his fingers together in front of his face for emphasis, “are you even talking about?”

“Poe!” Kylo raised his voice. Finn couldn’t believe he had the nerve to sound angry. “You keep talking to Poe. Isn’t that going a little too far with it?”

“What?” The younger man's voice was searching. “Why do you care so much that I am talking to…” He paused briefly. He can’t lose himself now, not when he is so close to being able to go home. “Rey’s friend Poe?”

The corner of Kylo’s mouth went slack. As he turned to reach for the doorknob, he avoided looking at Finn. “It’s fine, whatever. Do what you want.”

Finn reached an arm out, the door closing again with a light slam. “Oh no you don’t, you don’t get to do this.” He was fed up and he had a legitimate reason to be, too. But Finn couldn’t deny that deep down he was more pissed at Kylo for being this possessive over a guy he met two days ago. A guy he’s spent less than 2 hours with total. This is how weird he gets with guys after _one night_ of heavy petting? “Have you ever _once_ constructively talked about an emotion?”

“All I am asking is why you’re talking with Poe so much.”

It’s not like Finn can admit his actual relationship with him. “Why shouldn’t I talk to Poe?”

“I didn’t say you shouldn’t. I’m asking why you are.”

“Because he’s a nice guy, maybe?” Finn replied, confused and still pissed off. “Now it’s my turn to ask a question: why the hell did you pull me into this closet in the most terrifying way possible?”

Kylo’s brow knitted in thought and when he spoke, his voice had lost the edge from his previous questions. “Okay, but why were you touching each other like that?” 

“Yeah, never mind, I’m not doing this. Correction: I don’t even have to do this,” Finn said, reaching for the door. “Is that offer to do whatever I want still open? Because I’m out of here.”

“Wait.” 

Kylo’s voice was low and against his better senses, Finn paused. The older man bit his lower lip and before Finn could react, he felt those same lips pressed against his own. 

_What?_

Finn pushed Kylo off of him. “Why the hell are you kissing me in the middle of a fight?”

There was genuine confusion and rejection playing on Kylo’s face then that Finn could not decipher for the life of him. “That’s not where this was going?”

“No, you jackass, I am pissed off!” 

“Wait,” Kylo still seemed genuinely perplexed by the way the situation has played out. “Did you want to keep fighting about this?”

“Yes! What part of this is confusing to you?”

“Wow, you’re really into the role,” Kylo breathed out, almost astonished. 

“I am so sick of having to say ‘what’ every time you speak,” Finn said as he rubbed his temples. “What are you _talking_ about?”

“This thing you’re doing. Storm whatever,” Kylo said, trying and failing to use his hands to aid his explanation. “I’m trying to play along as best as I can but it’s hard to always have to wait to touch you.”

Finn deflated completely. “Come again?”

The older man leaned in, forcing Finn against the wall, and whispered into his ear. “It was really hot. You, pretending to be someone else.”

It took Finn’s brain a full minute to process what was happening. “You know that I’m me?” He shook his head in disbelief as if to reset his thoughts, interrupting Kylo’s lips as they trailed along his neck. “You know I’m Finn?”

Kylo used a free hand to draw circles on the back of Finn’s neck. He moaned an affirmative response. “You did such a good job, too. I didn’t realize what was going on at first but when I did, I didn’t know how I was going to control myself.”

“At first?” Finn felt a hand rest on his hip and slowly travel downward. “What do you mean at first?”

“In the car, when you sent me those,” Kylo spoke between kisses and bites as he worked his way towards Finn’s earlobe, “texts. I really thought it was all over between us.”

 _The car, the car._ He tried to remember what he sent to Kylo on that first night. None of the exact words came to mind - something desperate, that’s for sure, and maybe a forlorn message or two about the state of their relationship.

“I was so pissed at myself for pushing you away,” Kylo took the earlobe in his mouth and bit with more force than Finn expected, causing him to grunt. “I was being such an idiot but then you had Rey slip me your number and it clicked. Finn was gone, but enter the mysterious friend with the penetrating gaze.” 

Finn’s mind was racing - every action, every event, every dialogue. 

Kylo groaned loudly as he pressed Finn closer to him, “I don’t know how you controlled yourself in that car.”

“Rey,” _What._ “Slipped you my number?”

“Mmm,” Kylo kissed Finn on the lips, softly. “Having her come into my room that first night, telling me to text you an apology for my behavior. You knew I would recognize your number, didn’t you?” He was staring directly into Finn’s eyes now, a pleased look on his face. “I understood then. I waited that night for you to come.”

A lightbulb went off in Finn’s mind. It was a statement as much as it was a question. “The vase.”

“I told you. I finally got what you wanted,” Kylo smirked. “All those messages where you played coy. You were playing the song and I was going to dance ---”

 _What the actual fuck?_ Finn pushed Kylo off from him again as he spoke. He held up his hands to stop Kylo from re-approaching until he got answers. “If you were reading them, then why didn’t you reply to _any_ of my messages?”

“What?” It was nice to hear the word come out of Kylo’s mouth for once. “You know why. That’s why you planned this weekend.”

“I didn’t plan _anything_ ,” Finn had never stressed so many words in his life. 

The little hamster that seemed to always be asleep started running in the wheel of Kylo’s mind. “What do you mean?”

“Did you seriously think I tracked you down and found out that you were _miraculously_ my best friend’s cousin?” Finn’s face twisted in incredulity as he spoke. “And that, once finding out you were her cousin, that I managed to get myself invited for the weekend? That I sent you those messages as part of an elaborate role-play that would culminate in revealing my identity via phone number and us _almost_ having sex as part of some grand reconciliation despite the fact you’ve ignored me for nearly two week?”

Several moments passed in silence before Kylo spoke. “You didn’t do that?” 

“You’re kidding me,” Finn let out a sardonic chuckle, shaking his head in disbelief. “I can’t believe it. I really can’t believe it.” 

His voice got progressively louder as the emotions swirling in him stumbled over each other for dominance. Irritation, at himself, at Kylo, at the world, won. 

“Do you realize I’ve been going out of my _mind_ because of you? Not just this weekend, you know, but for a while now,” Sudden realization hit him as he spoke, “Oh my stars, I ruined a whole relationship because I couldn’t get you out of my head. And do I know you? Have I met you? _No._ You’re just some persistent guy who texted me one day and was just...incredibly vulnerable. And you seemed lonely and I was lonely and I don’t know! There were no expectations with you, I guess. Everyone else wants me to be something that I am not ready to be but you never tried to force me to open up, you just...” 

He stopped, looked at Kylo’s gawking face, then looked around in disbelief again. “Geez, what the hell is wrong with me. I’m in a coat closet right now and...will you say something, damnit?” 

Kylo stared at Finn with wide eyes. “What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know,” the younger man replied, defeated. He bent down and pushed some shoes off a rack and sat down on top. “I am not really sure what I want anymore. Or what I wanted to begin with. I wasn’t even supposed to meet you.”

“So this was all a coincidence?” the older man asked, quietly. 

“Yeah, of course! There is absolutely no way I would plan something that convoluted."

Kylo leaned and slid down the wall, pressing his knees to his chest when he finally made contact with the floor. He sat quietly, perpendicular to Finn, and trained his eyes on some spot on the opposite wall. Finn could hear Kylo's breathing, irregular, holding back some emotion he couldn't identify. He looked hurt and confused and Finn couldn't tell if he was upset at the lies or at the fact this wasn't some elaborate make-up sex getaway. Or maybe he was mad at him? The thought stopped Finn's wildly beating heart for a moment. Finn was the one that did something wrong, he was the one who'd been lying, so where he get off being this upset with Kylo? Maybe Kylo had realized that. After all, there is no one that was more of an open book than Kylo; the older man had always been honest with him. Finn never liked it when people were angry at him so he did his best to be non-offensive, to never say anything mean or offensive, even as a joke. He didn't like confrontation even if he was right. He'd rather have peace. But he didn't realize how uninhibited he was when it came to Kylo. Had he said too much, been too much like the real him, the Finn people may not like, that even _Kylo_ _was mad at him_?

Whether it was the unpredictability of Kylo's moods or the unpredictability of his own brain, but Finn didn't know how to read the situation and it frightened him that he wasn't in control. His heart beat was the only thing he could hear right now, and _damnit_ , he couldn't read the situation, he couldn't control it either, but he knew there was nothing more he wanted than to reach out and comfort the other man. 

“I wanted to look you up on the site I used to get Hux’s real number but I didn’t. I didn’t want to ruin what I had with you,” the other man finally said.

Finn's heat beat sped up and he could barely hear the words through the rhythmic pattering. “I know,” the younger man replied, softly. 

“And I was really happy when you told me your name. Way happier than any of the times you sent me a dirty message, which made me pretty fucking happy, by the way. When I sent you a picture of my face, and asked you to rate it, I didn’t expect anything from it. You know, a lot of drunk, horny guys in bars tell me I’m beautiful all the time.”

“Are you trying to brag right now?” Finn replied, trying not to react to the other man's irreverence toward the whole situation. Guess he's _not_ mad. 

“No, they’ll say anything to get you to sleep with them,” He locked eyes with Finn. “But when you said it, it was the first time I believed it, too. You wouldn’t lie to me.”

The younger man sighed. “Kylo, I just spent the last two and half days lying to you. Even if you did catch on, I didn’t mean for you to ever find out who I was.”

“Was it a lie though?” The older man was searching for something on Finn’s face. There was another question on his tongue that he couldn’t seem to get out so he repeated himself. “Was this whole weekend a lie?”

“What do you mean?”

“When you said you loved me,” the older man was averting his eyes now. “Did you mean it or were you just saying it to entertain me?”

“I meant it,” Finn admitted. “I still mean it and that’s why I wanted to just go home and forget this weekend ever happened.”

“I don’t understand. This isn’t what’s supposed to happen,” Kylo seemed smaller as he whispered. “What did I do?”

“You didn’t do anything. It’s me,” Finn said quickly. “It’s just...I have these feelings I can’t control. I want to see you, I want to be around you, and I want to touch you but I don’t know the first thing about you. Like, _fuck_ , I just found out your name was Ben this weekend.”

“Knowing that doesn’t mean you know me at all,” Kylo cut him off. “There are a lot of people who know me by that name that don’t understand who I am the way you do.”

“I didn’t know what you did for work or what you studied,” Finn kept going. “These things are important to you, right? You spend all your time working and studying.”

“When I was messaging you, they didn’t seem as important.”

“Doesn’t it bother you that you don’t know anything about me?”

“I wanted to know more about you all the time,” Kylo replied. “I wanted to be consumed by a world of Finn but you didn’t want that and I am okay with waiting until you are. I’m content with just peeking through the looking glass for now.”

“There are rules to these things though. You’re supposed to know someone to like them. It takes time. I got to know Poe before I even developed any romantic feelings. I mean, there was a physical attraction immediately but it’s hard to not have one when he looks like that. You saw him out there, right? He’s --”

“Okay, yes, I get it, he’s hot and perfect in every way. We don’t need to go over this every time he’s mentioned,” Kylo interjected sharply before catching himself. “Sorry.” 

Finn stared at him, perplexed at the response, before bursting out in laughter. “Holy shit, I get it now. You’re _jealous_ ,” he said in astonishment. “That’s what you meant before, about this whole weekend,” he pulled out his phone from his pocket and scrolled back to the last message exchange he had with Kylo. “You started ignoring me around the time I described my last date with Poe. After _you_ had asked about it, too.”

“I think it’s probably in the rule book that a guy has the right to be jealous when the person he loves describes how much they enjoy being with another dude,” he grumbled. “If you two were just having sex, it wouldn’t have mattered but then you started saying things like how he made you _feel_. I could pretend to know what it’s like to hold you but Poe made you feel like how I felt about you. It really fucking hurt.”

Rey’s words suddenly echoed in Finn’s mind: _What did you expect? For him to be cheery and happy after finding out the guy he likes might be into some other dude? And topping it all off, he’s thinking about that other guy even when he’s with you?_ “I think the only idiot in this whole situation is me,” he said to himself. 

“You’re one of the smartest people I know,” Kylo responded, strangely defensively. 

“That really says more about the people you know,” Finn laughed. “I tried to control everything and screwed up.”

“You’re cute when you laugh,” Kylo admired Finn’s face. “You’re even cuter when you admit you’re able to screw things up. Usually I’m the one ruining relationships.”

Finn thought back to Rey’s messages about Kylo’s “type.” _Absolute assholes._ Hux included. Him included. “Somehow I doubt you’re ever actually the problem.”

There was a smoldering look in Kylo’s eyes. “You’re so hot when you’re complimenting me.”

“I take it back. Maybe you’re the problem sometimes.”

Kylo shifted onto his knees and lifted himself up far enough so he could place his lips on Finn’s. “I think you’re perfect, even when you’re screwing things up.”

“You’re latching onto this whole ‘screwed things up’ thing very quickly,” Finn smiled as Kylo’s face hovered centimeters from his, lips posed for another kiss. “Does this level the playing field for you?”

“Only if you screw up again by agreeing to date me,” Kylo said with a kiss. “And then screw up some more so we never have to talk about Poe’s dumb hot face again.”

“I think you’re misunderstanding the meaning of the word.”

“That’s okay,” Kylo closed the distance between their lips. “There is only one type of screw I can think of when it comes to you anyways.”

With a simper, Finn thinks he may not need that ride after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading - I love each and every one of your comments and I do read them. I just get kind of nervous responding but they've motivated me to finish this so thank you, thank you, thank you! You don't know how much I appreciate it. :)


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